Murders and Daughters
What is common between Priyanka, Rajiv Gandhi’s daughter and ATS Chief Hemant Karkare’s daughter?
Both want to forgive the assailant of their father!
Priyanka’s visit to the jail where she met Nalini, who was one of the convicts in Rajiv Gandhi murder case. Nalini’s death sentence was changed to life imprisonment because of Sonia Gandhi’s intervention. [Link]
Rahul Gandhi surely thinks otherwise. Old Congressmen are now labelling him as ‘future Prime Minister’. Interestingly he carries the surname ‘Gandhi’ though not related to the Mahatma Gandhi, and has an illustrious mother who is so forgiving, but Rahul he has a ‘different way of looking at these things’.
Hemant Karkare’s daughter says, ‘Ajmal should be given another chance to live and realise what a grave crime he has committed.’ There was a sharp reaction to this statement from Ombale’s daughter who disagreed. Balasaheb Thackray endorsed that sentiment. [Link] [seen in pic Vaishali Ombale L, and Mrs Karkare R]
Why do we find ladies so forgiving even in the cases of heinous crimes affecting their personal lives? And, interestingly they are daughters! Daughters who are so attached to their father and almost invariably share a special relationship with him!!
Where does this ability to forgive come from? Is it in the nature of women?
Surely it must not be coming from men who like Rahul Gandhi usually have a ‘different way of looking at these things!’
Vivek
While one has nothing but great admiration for the actions of Smt Karkare’s daughter, and Priyanka Gandhi, perhaps they have the freedom to think of these things, as they are not burdened with the stress of everyday living subsequent to the loss of the main provider of the family. In late Tukaram Ombale’s case it is different. Nobody stands up when his family/wife/daughter visits any offices for their insurance etc type work, and they dont have any permanent security. Their respective attitudes have to be viewed in that context. And about politicians, I wish they would keep quiet…..
As usual, the contrasts & comparisons provoke thought.
I think different people have different ways of making peace with events in their lives.
The likes of Priyanka and Hemant Karkare's daughter have one way where forgiveness and seeing a life live, atone and move on, as perhaps the lens !
While the likes of Ombales daughter and Rahul Gandhi may look at it..well, differently !
I have seen forgiveness from close quarters. Men. Women. Rich. Poor. Elderly. young ! Not many. But the few that i have seen, lasts as a refreshing memory.
And i guess a lot depends on our world view !
Recent research suggests that men are more forgiving than women.Looking at from a different angle, I think it stems from what one has been taught one was young. These are ingrained between 3and 8 years of age. What does a Indian parent tell his son when he is hit by his friend? The answer is ‘don’t cry, are you a girl, just go and hit him back’.
Not forgiveness but eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth is taught. Thought provoking. sir.
DELETE MY EARLIER COMMENT as the first line contained a typographical error.
The new one is as under:
Recent research confirms that women are more forgiving than men.Looking at from a different angle, I think it stems from what one has been taught one was young. These are ingrained between 3and 8 years of age. What does a Indian parent tell his son when he is hit by his friend? The answer is ‘don’t cry, are you a girl, just go and hit him back’.
Not forgiveness but eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth is taught. Thought provoking. sir.
This is indeed thought provoking. Time heals all I think but I am not sure why some people can forgive and others cannot. I could not forgive that I do not think. Once perhaps the grief had passed perhaps I could who knows? I do not think women are more forgiing as such but perhaps have always had to compromise moreso than males. Interesting, I will need to think about this some more! Thnak you for your book suggestion on my blog I will do so.
When one undergoes a personal tragedy, either the mind can turn towards vendetta,which is a bitter and isolating emotion, or it can turn upwards and outwards, and find peace in forgiveness. You have so sensitively written about this in your post.
Agreed with Suchrita.
sorry for not visiting blog for a long time
Dear UK, Kavi, Harekrishnaji, Sucharita and Lilly’s Life,
Thanks for your views and comments.
Dear NSIyer, Thanks to you too. In lighter vein, was the research done by a man or a woman? 😉
Vivek