Preparing To Lead A Meaningful Life

You turned sixteen today, it is your birthday. Many happy returns of the day. (This was my letter to my granddaughter).

Since last few years I have been writing a letter to you on your birthday. So here is one more.

Why do people celebrate 16^th birthday? Because it marks the end of childhood and the onset of adulthood.

On another front, you moved closer to becoming a professional, be that as an accountant, or lawyer or doctor.

This is the point in life, inflection point it is called, when things must change, and change for the better. It is like a railway taking a turn – things will change for sure, no choice there, but the question is are you in the driver’s seat or you are a passenger?

Obviously, we want to be in the driver’s seat because we want to live life our way. And that calls for good decision making in life.

It is well known that our subconscious mind plays a crucial role in our decisions. How do we ‘train’ our subconscious mind? Here is what I recently read:

‘You think with your subconscious mind, and whatever you habitually think sinks down into your subconscious mind, which creates according to the nature of your thoughts. Our subconscious mind is a million times more powerful than the conscious mind. Lord Buddha once said, “You think, you become.”’

Training our subconscious mind is like storing information in the memory of our laptop. We type or keep photos to keep in memory of a laptop. We think to keep our thoughts in the subconscious.

But we rarely sit down to think about a subject or an event. It gets done when we read or write. When we write we think. Remember the wisdom of this Leslie Lamport quote – “If You’re Thinking Without Writing, You Only Think You’re Thinking.”

Thoughts and reflections on our daily life train our subconscious which in turn guides us in creative work as well as in making critical decisions. The subconscious mind gradually converts our thoughts into values and virtues which we follow. It makes us what we are.

I follow a simple technique. When I read non-fiction books and articles, I write down in my notebook well-articulated thoughts which appeal to me. (Admittedly there is also a selfish motive – I can quote from those books with quick reference to my notebook when I write my speeches or blog posts. And why not, because repetition only strengthens recording of those thoughts in my subconscious.)

Now let us come to the practical aspect. You have always watched me writing when you joined me over breakfast. What did I write every day?

That exercise is called ‘Morning pages.’ When I get up in the morning, I make my tea, a full large mug and sit down to write three pages in my notebook. Everyday. I read about this exercise in a book: ‘The Artists Way’ by Julia Cameron.

Writing morning pages means you write three pages. Write as your thoughts flow. There is no guidance on what you should write, just write anything which you wish to. But your must write three pages!

The lessons which I have learnt are these: First, our mind is fresh or ‘reset’ when we begin this exercise immediately after waking up. We do not begin with the negative thoughts – we acquire them during the day. We look at the world and events in our life with the mindset of a curious observer. Second, you cannot write three pages without reflecting on whatever is on your mind; I have found it impossible not to reflect during writing the morning pages.

And the subconscious stores it. This is why the author Julia Cameron recommends this exercise to improve our creativity. Because the subconscious ‘summons from the buried past exactly what we need exactly when we need it.’

Albie Sachs was the judge appointed to the first Constitutional Court of South Africa by Nelson Mandela. He was one of the excellent judges of South Africa. Making up one’s thoughts and writing judgements is one of the most challenging jobs. Very often cases before a judge raise questions of ethics, morality, fairness, and equity. You will appreciate those are not easy to answer. It depends on our upbringing, our experiences, and our processing of those experiences in our mind. In his book, he asked himself a question: “How do life experiences affect the legal decision making?” Then he comes up with this conclusion: the answer is ‘In unexpected ways!’

Our subconscious mind throws up the answer instantly. You may wonder as to why I am telling you this message and story. The answer is that you are entering adulthood. You will face critical situations in which you alone can make the decision. Our mind needs to be trained to make those decisions ‘in unexpected ways’ but relying on good principles and values.

And one way to do it is to read, write and specifically write ‘morning pages.’

Thanks for patiently reading this letter. I wish you the all the best in your life.

PS: Feature pic: Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Vivek S Patwardhan

What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others/ All work copyrighted.